Babies in Bars

[fairyrune]

Apparently there's a big kerfuffle going on about people brining their babies/children to bars.

Here's my take.

I am a non-whiny, non-spoiled, (hopefully) non-self-absorbed, twenty-something woman who is not yet married, and not planning on having children.

Though I do not make a habit of hanging out in bars regularly, I do occasionally patronize a few choice local establishments.

Babies do not belong in bars. Fact. End of story.

Hell, I think people shouldn't be letting their children run around Dave & Buster's after a certain hour, since there's people drinking in that giant bar in the middle of the room, but that's just me.

The fact of the matter is, there is a time and a place for everything. Bars are an adult establishment, and children simply do not belong there.

I really, really don't understand why people are even having this argument. The supposition that whiny twenty-somethings, (or thirty-somethings, or whatever-somethings; whiny-ness is unattractive no matter how old you are) are just as annoying as bawling children does not negate the fact that babies do not belong in bars.

Comments

[craftyskwrl.livejournal.com]

Unfortunately, the adult's need/desire to be at the bar or other adult-oriented venue seems to trump what would be better for the kid.

If there's no talking the adult out of going to the bar, which is worse? Should they leave their kid alone at home or bring them there?

[fairyrune]

My thinking is that when you choose to have children, you lose the ability to just drop everything and do whatever you want. It's part of what comes with being responsible for another human being.

If they really want to go to the bar, they can get someone to watch the kid. If that's not possible, then they need to suck it up and stay home. It's a universal part of being an adult in general: you can't always do whatever you want whenever you want.

[supertailz.livejournal.com]

For what it's worth, I don't entirely agree. Or rather, random New York bars? Sure! But when you get into the local pubs my mum and her friends went to in England when I was a kid? A) I think it can really hurt parents to restrict their social life in areas where there isn't a huge diversity of places for them to go, particularly if their friends are anything other than parents of children of about the same age. Then there's the added thing of where do you draw the line - what about establishments that also serve food? Is it only ones where they card at the door?

I do think - and this part of why I support this in some measure - that it tends to adversely hit the poorer and single-parent families who don't have as many options of leaving the kid with the other parent or paying for baby-sitters. I think there should be some boundaries and certainly some more family establishments and some less - I also quite liked how some of the pubs we went to when I was young had a more family, seated area and then a less family bar-ish area. But I don't think this extreme segregation of "Adult" and "youth" is always a positive thing and I would even say that I think it helps fetishise things like drinking as an "adult" activity that youth should aspire to as opposed to just being a natural and normal part of family life.


.../2 cents:)

[fairyrune]

I kind of see the local pub where you can go for dinner and perhaps a drink or two as a different kind of animal than a bar, you know? It's the difference between Bar None and the local place near me that makes a bacon cheeseburger with chili that also happens to have Guinness on tap. (OMG SO GOOD)

Places like Bar None? No babies. At all. Ever. My local place? I'd raise an eyebrow if I saw somebody sitting at the bar with their kid after, say, ten o'clock, but it's not *completely* inappropriate.

[synnoveaevael.livejournal.com]

reminds me of sweet home alabama... "you have a baby... in a bar."

i was 3 days old when i first entered a bar. and not a pub. a bar. my dad was on a softball league. it was july. 3 days old i went to the bar, and was put on a pool table in my car seat and cooed at. i remember "working" behind a bar at the age of 4 or so. cleaning dishes cause i didn't have to bend over. it was illegal for me to be there. but i was. i don't really agree with it. but. there we go.

[supertailz.livejournal.com]

I absolutely agree. But personally I think I prefer local pubs:) When I was a kid my mother belonged to singing groups and the like that happened in pubs - or like after a day of faire when people gather at somewhere like Ireland's? I actually think it's a nice kind of local, takes-a-village feeling to have kids. But somewhere like Bar None? Not in a million years.

My problem with the article you linked to - both of them actually - is that I didn't much like either writer. They both seemed kind of mean and intolerant and whiny. I would rather have an adorable baby than EITHER of those people in a bar with me:)

[fairyrune]

I didn't like the anti-babies in bars woman, but the pro-babies in bars guy I HATED. He seemed like a self-centered jerk.

[craftyskwrl.livejournal.com]

IAWTC

[damnitnicole]

For what it's worth, I was the little kid in the bar sometimes.

I don't believe I was ever at a bar when I was an infant, but when I was 4, I know that my Mom only got to out around every couple of months to start with, and if she couldn't find a sitter, then I was dressed up in a cute outfit and brought along.

I knew how to behave around grownups. I learned how to run drinks to the table, 2 at a time, and how to tip the bartender for my Pepsi. In return, I was given plenty of quarters for the pinball machine, and I stayed out of trouble and entertained.

Actual infants, not so much, mainly for the noise, but well behaved little kids in a neighborhood watering hole? I don't see why not.

[fairyrune]

I mentioned elsewhere that I think that the "neighborhood watering hole," as you put it, is a different kind of a thing from a bar. When I think "bar," I think of a place where bunches of people go to drink that doesn't really serve food.

If it's a family-friendly establishment, and the kids aren't causing trouble, no problem.